Who is Your Master?

The past few days I've been waiting on a scholarship application response. With any situation that involves hard work and productivity judged and valued by another person or group, you'd best believe I'd have at least some anxiety. This anxiety really carried; My mind would wander into thoughts and false realities I'd be convinced were true. 

"But what about the money? If you win this money it will help pay for a tuition you've always felt guilty about."
"What about the prestige? If you don't win this your standing in the program will fade away and you'll be invisible. "
"What about the perks? You won last year and if you don't win this year that looks poor on you. How will you build your career then?"

After days of continuous mind-battering, I was pretty fed up with how often my stomach would drop and how insanely mean and worried my mind had become. So I took a step back and said to myself, Reputation, you are not my master. Money, you are not my master. Fear, you are not my master. 

I said it over and over and over again each day, to the point when any anxiety filled me, it'd be second nature to say YOU are not my master. And for a crazy, weird, wonderful reason, I'd feel this supernatural peace amidst my fear and anxiety. My anxiety didn't necessarily leave - my stomach still sank at times - but I felt an overarching peace as I understood that the things I produce in this world, my fear of man, and my fear of failure, were not my masters. I no longer felt like a slave to these things. 

Matthew 6 portrays this concept of masters quite clearly. 

NO ONE can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other.

And right after that passage he says, 

 THEREFORE, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about your body what you will wear.

I heard a pastor say once that worry exposes your true master. Worry gives way to your innermost seeking and want. 
~When I unhealthily worry about money, it's clear that money has become the master over me. While I think I consume things with money, money is actually consuming me. 
~When I worry about my reputation,  pride and prestige are my masters. Sooner or later I find that I'm climbing this mountain towards my reputation and it only takes one small slip to fall face flat on the ground. 
~When I worry about what people think of me, who cares for me, and if people love me, people become masters over me. I become a slave to other human beings who are just as imperfect as I am.

My question to you is this: What do you want? What do you seek? Jesus commands us to not worry, but seek the kingdom first and his righteousness, and ALL these things - your clothes, your food, your everything - will be given to you.

Do you seek reputation? Do you seek approval? Do you seek security? Then WHO is your master? When God is my master, I find that I'm no longer chained down to mere things - I am actually free in his authority. He gives me an overarching peace that he will provide and already has, and he'll give me wisdom in understanding how I should use my money, how to glorify him with my work, how to love others even if they don't love back. 

I challenge you today to examine your life and your worries. If there are things hindering you from spiritual and emotional freedom, make clear that those things will not rule over you, for you are loved by the Lord and given freedom through him. 

Live well and spread love,
Gracie